The ups and downs of adjusting to a new kind of practice.
by: Ania Small Ph.D.
Between practice, teaching, traveling to seminars and seeing friends Aikido has been a way of life for me for a long time. Here is the account of the experience of adapting my practice due to the pandemic. It describes the struggle and ups and downs of trying to adjust and find meaning in a new kind of training. I’m writing it both as a student and teacher, responsible in part for running a dojo. I hope it can start conversations about our experience, so we can support and help each other go through this period and learn.
Dealing with the pandemic involved going through stages of grief repeatedly, at the beginning, and later, when it became clear that we are in it for a long haul. Denial is usually my favorite coping mechanism, so I leaned on it several times: “we won’t have to stop offering classes”, “it will just be a short break”, “no big deal, I’ll just run and practice sword”. But in reality I miss Aikido, the sweaty, vigorous training, that leaves you invigorated, interactions on the mat, and all that’s involved in sharing practice with other students at the dojo.
There was and continues to be anger lurking beneath the surface. Whether it’s directed at those not treating this pandemic seriously, at the virus itself, and the limitations it created or any daily obstacles, it seems fueled by the persistent lack of control. After some bargaining about the duration of this reality came the sadness, the kind that sits on your chest, and makes it hard to be your usual positive self. Then the awareness of all that we still have, gratitude and acceptance. Since then I seem to rotate through all of these over and over. The realization that it won’t be just a continuous progress, getting us closer and closer to how we used to train, felt like a huge blow again.
What helped was maintaining connection with Aikido friends and teachers, establishing a new fitness routine, working on creative adaptations of Aikido practice, and finding ways to mark progress. All of them allowed to maintain a sense of control and purpose, when everything outside worked against it. I truly believe that since responding to a challenge is part of Aikido training, all adaptations we make will serve us well in our future practice. There is a reason we fall down and get up probably around a hundred times in each class: Aikido is a great lesson in resiliency.
Staying connected with our students, teachers and Aikido friends has been probably the most important aspect of surviving the changes to our training.
The reality of Covid brought home the importance of community in Aikido practice. Seeing each other faces on the screen and and sharing how we were coping became paramount. It continues to be incredibly valuable to see each other in person even from a distance and through a mask. It feels like dealing with this adversity deepened our relationships, and allowed us to form stronger bonds. The pandemic forced us to experience each other in a different context. Previously quiet students started asking great questions, and engage in learning more actively. Different format seemed to suit their learning style a little bit better. For some, the zoom format has been challenging, but they stuck with it to stay connected. And there are a few who decided against participating through zoom, but rejoined us for outdoor weapons training.
Not being able to practice in our physical space meant also that we’re not tied to it. Since people around the country and the world have been in the same boat, connecting with others living far away to share Aikido became an option. Having teacher friends from all over the country “visit us” to lead classes has definitely been a highlight of this experience. It allowed our students to be exposed to different teachers, and for us to learn from the way they led their classes. Using this time for a virtual book club felt like a great adaptation, and allowed us to share thoughts on Saotome Sensei’s writing with others around the country.
The other important resource has been regular zoom classes taught by our friends and teachers. That created consistent connection, allowed an opportunity to ask questions and inspired our own teaching. Even after a lot of dojos, including ours have been able to resume training outside, staying in touch with others continues to be important. It feels necessary to share our experiences and it continues to be incredibly valuable to check in through FaceTime, text, or phone call.
Establishing and sticking with a fitness routine in place of a regular Aikido practice has been another important factor in adjusting to the reality of pandemic. Continuing conditioning and staying in good Aikido shape became a new challenge. It meant more frequent runs, incorporating a core workout into zoom Aikido classes and trying to stay flexible. Although nothing can really replace Aikido practice, and it’s conditioning, it helped me continue getting the heart rate up, and recreate the energizing feeling of Aikido training. Having a routine, just like a class schedule, helped me stick with it most of the time.
Discovering different ways to practice, and applying Aikido principles to daily activities has been a necessity during the pandemic. Suspending training in the dojo got me out of the routine of seeing it as a place where Aikido practice happens, and forced me to look for it elsewhere. I love being outdoors, and always considered being inside as a drawback of Aikido training. The challenge became to focus on finding ways to “practice” outside, and find inspiration in nature. Beyond the obvious choice of doing sword or jo outside, I worked to incorporate Aikido principles to outside activities, such as running, walking or swimming. I continue looking for extension and spirals in different everyday movements, focusing on taking in the nature and moving to reflect being a part of it. I found this kind of practice really rewarding.
I’m sure that as we adjust our expectations of how long this will go on, we’ll have to develop new adaptations and coping strategies. Preparing to run a marathon rather than sprint has already forced us to be creative. Our practice is about adaptation and resiliency and it will survive and be enriched in the process. I hope that this experience will deepen our training and draw more people to Aikido practice. As in “Love in The Time of Cholera”, our Aikido, like love will go on.
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